still senses something's not right here...
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One more week-- whatever a "week" means...
So, today I begin the last last week, here in my hometown, before I head off again on a brand new adventure. It is funny how much easier it is to admit certain things hidden deep inside me before I'm about to leave them. Not just to others; but to myself. I've always, always vowed to be 100% honest with myself, even if I do not speak it aloud. I vow to feel it and know it, and be conscious of the truth no matter what mask I might wear to hide it.
So with this vow I have to admit that there… Continue
So with this vow I have to admit that there… Continue
Posted on July 27, 2009 at 5:30pm — 7 Comments
New Chapter: Decision "Made"
This is the email I sent today to my prospective employers in Malaysia:
Hello to everyone at MindValley-
I am going to give you a little piece of my heart here.
I did not expect AIESEC to be so unresponsive to our persistence with getting me a working permit. I thought getting the job and convincing you guys that I'm right for the job would be the hardest part, but evidently the hardest part of the process is that which is not in my hands.
What I do have in my… Continue
Hello to everyone at MindValley-
I am going to give you a little piece of my heart here.
I did not expect AIESEC to be so unresponsive to our persistence with getting me a working permit. I thought getting the job and convincing you guys that I'm right for the job would be the hardest part, but evidently the hardest part of the process is that which is not in my hands.
What I do have in my… Continue
Posted on July 18, 2009 at 8:00pm — 6 Comments
Where I Am in the Script.
This is an email I sent Jason last week. His response was helpful, but I was curious to hear what others might have to say, or if you have any words of guidance...
Jason,
Firstly, I’m sorry. I’m sure you’re a busy guy and answer hundreds of questions from hundreds of people every day, but I can barely function so I hope you can give me a little bit of your time. I left work today because I needed to ask these things!
In the Unteaching document Letting Go, you state the… Continue
Jason,
Firstly, I’m sorry. I’m sure you’re a busy guy and answer hundreds of questions from hundreds of people every day, but I can barely function so I hope you can give me a little bit of your time. I left work today because I needed to ask these things!
In the Unteaching document Letting Go, you state the… Continue
Posted on July 14, 2009 at 5:20pm — 9 Comments
What Do You Do in an Unexistent World?
If none of this is real, what do I do?
How do I be?
How do I be?
Posted on July 13, 2009 at 7:59pm — 10 Comments
Torn.
I'm not usually one to ask for help or advice... mostly because I'm rather hard on myself and figure I should know how to handle any situation I'm in. But I'm finding it hard to hear my gut clearly on this one.
I recently got a job in Malaysia, working for a marketing company called MindValley. They "spread enlightened ideas", meaning that if you were to, say, write a book, you could hire MindValley to market it over the web for you. I've been hired as their copywriter, so I would be… Continue
I recently got a job in Malaysia, working for a marketing company called MindValley. They "spread enlightened ideas", meaning that if you were to, say, write a book, you could hire MindValley to market it over the web for you. I've been hired as their copywriter, so I would be… Continue
Posted on July 5, 2009 at 7:00pm — 8 Comments
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It began yesterday... (can write, can gesture, just can not speak)... and already i am feeling more FREE to be who/what i am.
xoxo
and i am happy you are still here, if only for the rest of us.
What i do know, fully, is that things are unfolding perfectly.
And i've learned to trust my own inner voice more than anyone or anything outside... no matter who it is.
Many hugs with these words, you are beautiful.
xoxo
Been thinking about you.
xoxo
i've had the feeling many times... 'why WHY does jason not respond to my little comments, or even-- my messages..'... yes i do empathize with you, as well.
Finally, these past two weeks, i have an answer (from within my own heart) that helps me to grow and expand here with the blue emerald family, and without bitterness, feeling 'ignored', 'left out' or worse-- 'left behind'.
Here is what came into my heart, just when needed, and i do feel jason was behind it, etherically and through the alchemy...
He is showing me how to find my own way, for one thing, without depending upon another 'guru' or 'teacher' --and he IS both these things, yet he teaches without teaching or preaching. There are no rules; everything i ever thought to be truth is not real, yet is real too, at the same time. How do we learn to BE this kind of truth, if someone (jason or peter or sandi) is constantly monitoring? We cannot.
At the same time, i cannot begin to relate to you the number of times i have, quite literally, tripped over my lower lip, it was hanging down in a pout clear to my knees!! Not bragging about this sorry aspect, yet it needs to be shared so you might begin to know you are not alone here.
TBE is jason and the alchemy, yes, but mostly it is us, we who put ourselves here, learning, sharing, laughing, crying, and yes, pouting occasionally, then healing into whole, all.
Keep writing sweetie.. --and now, on another note:
How's that new job ? Have wondered about you many times. xoxo
Might not be the same for you.
My thought here, reading your comments here and on Calvin's page, is that your subconscious Mind is fighting you and TBE.
i would be sad to see you go away.
xoxo
was just thinking about you this morning, knew i'd be writing a comment to you today... then saw your post welcoming Alyn...
How's it all going for you ?
i've been clearing, removing so many old 'stuff and things'... as have we all.
love to you--
judith
Yes it makes you wonder some time why we have chosen a particular family or why they have chosen us. for me, in my family (Brothers and Sisters) I enjoy there company and it pleases me much to be with them, but sometime I don't really fit there --hard to explaind. Example we don't share the same view on religion and life in general I guess they feel that I’m different but at the same time I feel accepted.
Here in NB the weather is bad, rain all the time, cold and windy. So enjoy the beautiful BC weather and maybe sent us a little bit of sunshine in your thoughts. I try not to be negative about it; it makes me enjoy that strange ball of ligh and fire in the sky that much more whenever it finally shows it self though the clouds.
Hope you have a good weekend
Talk to you soon
Best Alyre
I’m also quite new to the Blue Emerald and i learn as I go.I read the comments made in forum and try to learn as much as possible. I have a lot of questions in my mind like why are we here, why work all the time, what are we suppose to learn here, etc, and maybe we just repeat this cycle of life here on earth in a three dimensional form for ever or ….. . I like this site because I meet like minded people and this unteachings approach is very fascinating.
I see that writing is your passion, and you can see that I’m definitely not a writer, French is my first language and English is my second and I have to admit my French writing is not much better LOL .
But if you permit me to quote you a phrase from Deepak Chopra in one of is book that I have read a few years ago—(he says: even if you would have all the money in the world and you would still be doing the same work that you are doing now; - like you still be writing – then you can be sure this is your true passion.) and maybe this your true calling and this is were it will bring the most joy, love and happiness.
Best
Alyre
PS: Thank you for inviting me as a friend
Peace,
Dazey
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